The third trimester is approaching. I am not feeling terribly bad yet…still able to sleep, no nasal congestion like last time. However, I do weigh more. I have been really careful about my diet since seeing the doctor and also making extra efforts to be active. I haven’t had any food I actually like in about three weeks, except a couple of dark chocolate chips. And I’ve been walking an extra 30 minutes most days.
I did not feel energetic in the second trimester, and have remained lethargic and fatigued throughout pregnancy. I notice that I am starting to become more forgetful too.
I don’t think we are going to have any more kids after this, not because I wouldn’t love a big family, but because I am too tired to handle more, and I am also getting older. I don’t really feel sad or terribly wistful that this is the last one. I had doubts about my fertility and I married very late and I wasn’t sure I’d ever even get to have two, so the second feels kind of like a bonus. Also, I don’t like pregnancy and being tired all the time.
We will be meeting with a doula this weekend.
As far as coping with grief, I am wading through it slowly. It really helps that both babies are keeping me busy.