Somebody just found this blog via a Google query on “should I go on vacation if my father has terminal cancer?”
My knee-jerk reaction was “Hell no. Stay with your dad.”
But I suppose there are arguments to the contrary. Technically, “terminal” cancer can mean your dad has years left. Does it really help anyone if you suffer along with him? In the end you, too, have a finite amount of time on this Earth, as do we all. You could be hit by a bus tomorrow. And you can spend today being miserable and denying yourself happiness, but that won’t change the fact that your dad has terminal cancer. Who knows–a vacation might be a nice break from the trauma.
Since my mom fell ill (coming up on two years now) I’ve stopped traveling, I’ve stopped exercising, I’ve stopped writing fiction and poetry, I’ve stopped going to restaurants, I’ve neglected my career, I’ve stopped maintaining my yard and let my lilies get eaten by deer. I figure if my parents can’t live life, then I don’t want to either.
But I have lost two years of my life to penance, and I’m not sure any longer that my approach is the right one.
Today I will do something to make myself happy.
I can wait and wait for the sun–but there is no guarantee it will come out again.
So maybe it doesn’t hurt to dance in the rain.